Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Attitude is important !!!

Attitude, as you have heard many times, is everything. Theories on this topic have been written in thousands of books, spoken to millions of people, and driven deep into your mind.
Why? Because it's true…….at least more often than never.

Your attitude is your own personal filter for everything that happens to you, around you, or within you. What takes place in this world is not as important as how you view it.
You cannot choose what will happen to you. You cannot guarantee success and happiness for yourself. These things are most of the times beyond your control. You can, however, choose how you feel about these things, about how you respond to these situations. Your choice & your response to situations determine the quality of your life.

With a positive attitude, you will have the ability to be happier each and every day, make others around you happier, and live a good life.

Below are seven tips that can be a ready reckoner which can help you keep your positive attitude going.


When you find yourself getting fed up and your mood is taking a turn for the worse, take a step back and put things into perspective.

Is the stress and frustration really worth it? When you look at the bigger picture, don't they seem a bit insignificant?
They should, because nine times out of ten the daily problems we face are not really that important when we take a look at life as a whole.

You are alive; you have food, shelter, and freedom. These things are reason enough to smile when you wake up in the morning. So start the day with a broad smile to yourself. A start to one more beautiful day ahead.


You are expecting something in the mail. Each day you run to the mail box, filled with excitement and anticipation.
People love to look forward to things. Some say that anticipation of something happening is better than when it actually happens.

We all have special events that keep coming up. Holidays, birthdays, vacations, weekends, etc. Even nature provides its bounties every day without any discrimination, the sunrise, the sunset, the beautiful flowers, the colorful & chirpy birds, & so much more. However, it becomes truly celebrating if it comes as a surprise. Keeping these in mind will give you something to stay excited about, something to look forward to.
Do all this with anticipation in mind, not expectation, as expectation has the tendency to reduce joy.


There is no better way to forget about your worries than to help out someone else. When you take the focus off yourself, and direct that to helping people, your attitude will change dramatically. This will make you more responsive & sensitive to life.

This not only includes helping friends and family, but also volunteering to help those in need whom you may not know. When you start doing this regularly, you are more gainfully occupied & therefore less are the chances of you feeling low or depressed. When you are in that state of mind, you start living in the present moment & life starts giving you tenfold reasons to smile.


There are times when the only solution is to get away from it all. If you know that you are in a negative mood, or have been in low spirits for some time, take a break. It could be just what you need.

Taking a break can vary from a short trip in your car, to a vacation in the Bahamas. A walk around the block or a leisurely drive around the neighborhood can also work wonders for your mood and attitude. Indulge in yourself…..pamper yourself…..just let loose.


Talking things out can help you see the good in a bad situation. Call a friend and tell him/her about your problem, or just chat about any topic that comes to you. This is a very therapeutic and effective cure to a rough day. Pent out your feelings & you feel light, as if a huge weight has been removed off your back. Remember, everyone goes through ups & downs; it’s a part of life. A friend would in fact give you a good reason to laugh & move ahead.


One thing to always remember is that life is short. The worst thing would be to look back on your days wishing you could have been happier. Now is the time to take a good look at your attitude and make the necessary improvements.

Days, weeks, months, and years have a way of rushing by. ‘Time & tide waits for none’. Remember time is going by, as you brood or celebrate. So why waste it in brooding. Nature has given each one of us equal time. Its 24 hours for one & all, not a moment more or less. Look back with no regrets, only happy memories.


A common cause for a poor attitude is the feeling that you are in a situation that is just too hard to deal with.
Perhaps you don't have the job you want, or you may have a boss that drives you crazy. It may even be more serious than that. You may be too young, too old, too tired, too unlucky, etc...

People have done more with less.

So many people from all over the world have overcome obstacles, solved problems, and maintained a positive attitude through the most trying of times. If they can do it, so can you.

The power of a positive attitude is always within your reach. You simply have to extend your hand and grab it. Use the tips above to gain a great attitude, and to make your life happier, healthier, and wealthier.

Want to know how to maintain this throughtout your life & more???
Visit or contact any Art of Living Instructor in your area. We would be happy to assist you in making your life a continous celebration.

So go ahead & have a wonderful day…

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Its so easy to learn Chinese !!!

Simply Chinese : (Just pick up the accent by watching a few Chinese movies)

Are you harboring a fugitive- Hu Yu Hai Ding?

See me A.S.A.P. - Kum Hia Nao

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Your price is too high - No Bai Dam Thing

Did you go to the beach - Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat

It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?

Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?

That was an unauthorized execution.- Lin Ching

I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone. - No Pah King

You are not very bright - Yu So Dum

I got this for free - Ai No Pei

I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?

Please, stay a while longer - Wai Go Nao?

Our meeting was scheduled for next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao

They have arrived - Hia Dei Kum

Stay out of sight - Lei Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Resource Mobilisation

It's a fine sunny day in the forest, and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his laptop. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

Fox : "What are you working on?"
Rabbit : "My thesis."
Fox : "Hmm. What is it about?"
Rabbit : "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."
Fox : "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes!"
Rabbit : "Come with me and I'll show you!"

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After a few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to work on his laptop and resumes typing.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

Wolf : " What's that you are writing?"
Rabbit : " I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves."
Wolf : " You don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"
Rabbit : " No problem. Do you want to see why?"

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow, and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing.

Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you doing?

Rabbit : " I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears."
Bear : "Well that's absurd!
Rabbit : "Come into my home and I'll show you"

As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the Lion !!!


In the context of the working world:-


It's a fine sunny day in the forest, and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk.

Fox : "Do you know the time, because my watch is broken"
Lion : "Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you"
Fox : "Hmm. But it's a very complicated mechanism, and your great claws will only destroy it even more"
Lion : "Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed"
Fox : "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches"
Lion : "Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed".

The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in the sun,
looking very pleased with himself.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun.

Wolf : "Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken"
Lion : "Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you"
Wolf : "You don't expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV"
Lion : "No problem. Do you want to try it?"

The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV.

The wolf goes away happily and amazed.

Scene: Inside the lion's cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.



In the context of the working world:-

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

My first steps in India

I was four years old then. Baba had got his transfer orders, & we were to shift from Nepal to India. My first steps out of my birthplace & into our country. (Incidentally, by birth, I can claim citizenship of Nepal). It was’nt so crowded those days, & neither the security measures so tight. It was a delegation of six families returning to India. I remember, we were five kids in all. The flight from Kathmandu to Patna was exhilarating for us, to say the least; unbound with wonder & joy. While the elders kept serious (as usual), & of course were busy overseeing that everything was in order, we kids were running around & yelling at every instance, squealing at every new thing that we saw, jaws dropping at the sight of the aeroplane… was complete chaos. On board the aircraft & airborne, we would rush into the cockpit & gape at the sky ahead, the foamy clouds forming a bed below….soft & white….in various shapes & sizes. All our childhood imagination of various images came to life in the white canvas. A very patient pilot was trying his best to explain to us all the functions at his controls, while the elderly airhostess, had a hard time coping with our enthusiasm……it must’ve been her first tryst with real brats.

Once we landed at Patna, it suddenly felt so alien. Gone were all the towering mountains, the snow, the small winding mountain roads, the yaks, the Nepalese, the chill of the Himalayas. Instead, it was grimy, sultry & dry heat. However, we kids were too occupied by what our eyes could lay sight on. Large buildings, so many people, a much larger airport, large trees……. We had finally landed on the soil of the mystical India, our own India. Baba & other men got busy with managing our luggage (it was a whole lot), the customs, the regulations etc, while Maa along with other ladies were managing us…the brats. Since the govt regulations were taking quite long, Baba being the head of the delegation, decided that he will stay back along with Maa & a couple of others, while the rest would take the airport transfer bus to the Govt guest house. I came to know later that, Baba had instructed an uncle to take care of me. Maa told him to be patient with me & make me have my lunch with the other kids. Maa also fondled me lovingly & told me to listen to the uncle & be good. Guess she was a little worried for me. It was a new place & I could not be trusted with my pranks & ideas. However, I was too excited with all that was happening around & did not notice, while getting into the bus that Maa was staying back. Someone told me that Maa was sitting behind & I need to behave & be quiet, else she will get down from the bus. So I sulked & sat quietly for a while. But the moment the bus started, we kids forgot everything about being quiet, & were squealing besides the driver, egging him to race. We started counting the number of cars & vans that we overtook. The roads were huge & different. Having come to India for the first time, we were totally at awe with whatever we saw, even for a small city like Patna.

When we got down at the guest house, everyone got busy with their belongings & their children. I was left alone & suddenly I felt vulnerable….suddenly I missed being with Maa. So I started asking for my Maa. Everyone was busy, & just told me to wait quietly. They could not bear my anxiety & one of the aunt, scolded me & told me to just shut up. She told me that because I have been so naughty, a goblin had thrown Maa off the bus , & now she will be able to come only if I behave & kept quiet. She thought this will make me shut up & sit quietly, but just the opposite happened. I bottled up for a brief while. I was scared for my Maa. How is she ?? Where is She?? Is she hurt?? She does’nt speak Hindi well at all. How will she ask for directions ???..... I had questions hitting me like arrows. Suddenly, turning around, I started walking back towards the main road. I had to bring my Maa back. Nobody realized that I slipped away.
In my mind, I was thinking. I felt I knew the road. It has to be one straight road (what else??...that’s how it was in Nepal). So I walked straight, and I walked & walked & walked till I could walk no longer. I was feeling hungry & thirsty & lost. Vehicles kept going by, people looking at me curiously, the heat getting to me….I felt quite dizzy. On top of everything, there was no sign of Maa. Where is she….how is she?? I started asking all passerby about her. I started telling them that we had just come this morning from Nepal, & Maa has been thrown off the bus by a goblin. Tears welled in my eyes…… I was worried, Maa was lost. Imagine my audacity, I did not know where I was, & here I was wondering that Maa was lost somewhere. I felt totally helpless. I could not check my emotions. Why did I play with my friends,…… I should have taken care of Maa. I was so angry with myself.
I stopped at a junction, not knowing where to go now, & started crying. Guess, I must’ve created quite a scene. I suddenly realized being surrounded by a crowd, not knowing what to do with me. From nowhere, a young boy(probably in his teens) emerged from the crowd & held my hand. He was very soft with me. Gasping between my breaths & managing my tears, I narrated the whole story. I told them all to help me find my Maa. Not once did I realize that it was me who was lost (ignorance is indeed bliss). That boy took me to a traffic policeman & they spoke something between themselves. Later, he put me up on a cycle rickshaw & took me to the Police Station. On the way, he kept me busy with stories. I vaguely remember it now. At the Police Station, I was given to eat some pakoras & sweets. I also had lassi. Food put me in good spirits. The police men probably found a playmate in me & were busy keeping me happy & occupied. They showed me a rifle & a pistol and I got busy playing ‘Chor – Police’… I don’t know how time went by. The elderly Policeman (must’ve been the Station in charge), told me lovingly that I should not worry, & Maa & Baba would be coming in soon. Suddenly, I saw Baba running in towards me, tears all over his face. I did not know what to say. All I could muster up was, “ why are you crying. See I am fine. Where is Maa??..... have you found her??? Is she ok???...has she eaten??” I was still not aware of the huge chaos I had created. Baba could only smile & wrap me up in his arms so very lovingly.

Meanwhile, at the other end, those people realized that I was missing, & the panicked. Baba was known for his short fuse & they were scared. I was nowhere to be found. Guess they somehow mustered up courage to contact him & tell him. Baba was simply livid. He screamed & was almost out of control with anger. They broke into a few groups & spread across the city looking for me. Those days, communication system was as primitive as one can imagine, & one had to depend on relaying messages through people. They went to various public places, various hospitals, various police stations. I was nowhere to be found. Imagine their plight !!! around late afternoon, a passerby told Baba that he had seen a man taking a small boy in a rickshaw. I matched the description of the boy he had seen. Those days child lifting was rampant, & Baba felt numb with fear. He believed that I had been taken away by a child lifter. He had lost his son. It was towards late evening that they got the message of a boy been found at a Police Station, near the Railway Station. They rushed to the spot, praying all through the way. And there I was sitting & playing Chor Police, giggling & running around. Later Maa, with tears in her eyes, just hugged me, and would not leave me for a second. As if she had got back her life. It was a scene full of drama….complete blockbuster of a movie. Both of us hugging & asking each other, “Where did you get lost??? Did you get hurt ???

To this day, I don’t know who the young man was who brought me to the Police Station safely & left me there. Baba tried his best to trace the person, but no one could find him. People described him as a young boy in his teens, who spoke very less, who was very soft in words & was always smiling. He had left giving me a hug & a kiss on my forehead, & had told the police men to feed me & keep me busy with stories. (Any guesses???) I believe it was GOD (Guruji on Duty), who did His bit to protect me.
Probably it was Providence saying that I would always be footloose & full of adventure!!!!.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Me & My Parents...... Reunion !!!

The next journey was to Shirdi, Sai Baba Temple, again on a Sunday. This time the journey was longer. Shirdi is about 110 kms ahead of Nashik. It took us almost 7 hours to drive down. Starting in the morning, we reached around lunch time. So we freshened up, had lunch & then proceeded to the temple. Obviously, the place was crowded, & I had no option but to catch hold of a tout who could get us in through one of the VIP gates (of course for an amount…… how situations persuade us to succumb to such covert actions!!!). Life really is a great leveler. I normally would never use bribe, but in order to get some comfort for my parents, I was so readily willing (our choices shape our lives.....hmmmm)

The darshan went off very well….. Maa & Baba could be with the pundits & do a Pooja. Baba is a devout follower of Shirdi Sai Baba….so he was overwhelmed with joy. It was his dream to come here & offer a Pooja to Sai Baba. After the Pooja, we decided to feed a few children to lunch. It all went off very well. We started back late in the evening & reached Mumbai quite late in the night. The traffic was quite heavy & chaotic. Maa & Baba were obviously quite tired after such a long journey (7 hours drive on either side), but they looked so happy. I was left wondering… small things make us happy…content & satiated.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Me & My Parents...... Reunion !!!

So having made this reunion of sorts after so many years, I decided to take my parents out on long drives. We first visited Trambakeshwar, one of the 12 Swayambhoo Jyotirlingams of Lord Shiva. This place is about 35 kms ahead of Nashik. Its considered to be a very holy place. Millions of Hindu travel there to perform Puja for their ancestors. It is widely believed that offerings at Trambakeshwar, ensures peace & good rebirth for the departed souls. The travel by car from Mumbai took us almost 6 hours ( we halted once for breakfast & once for lunch). The weather was beautiful & the sky was tolerant with clouds & light breeze. The day we went was a Sunday, & it was Mahalaya, the first day of the Maa Durga’s Pittra Paksha…… the first day of the Navaratri. It was crowded like crazy. No way could I have taken Maa & Baba through the maze of people there. The serpentine lines of people were enough to dissuade even the most enthusiasts. However, fortunately I had some contacts through my AOL circle & managed to get my parents sneaked in through the back door (talk of ways Guruji helps us in every step). The darshan & pooja went off very well. Maa & Baba were very pleased. It had been their desire for many years to visit this place. Baba, actually could not hold his tears….he gets very emotional at times. In fact in 2004, I had come here to make my offerings for my ancestors. I had done Pujas like Tripindi shradh, Kaalsarp, Narayan Nagbali & Mahamrityunjay japa. Baba had met with a serious accident then & had been bed ridden with almost no hope of recovery. He had been hit by a matador from behind while he was on his bicycle. At this age, the recovery process is very long & slow, niggled with complications. I had to stay there inside the temple premises for two days & conduct Pujas & Homas at various times of the day, as per scriptures. The Pundit who conducted the Pujas for me was very happy with the proceedings & had mentioned that as a boon from the Puja, one day I would be able to visit here with my parents. That’s when my Puja would be complete. At that time I did not know how that could be possible. It seemed absolutely improbable, but I kept quiet and accepted the blessings as it was coming from someone who knew more about all this than me. We have been taught to respect & accept anything that comes from learned ones, & this Pundit was certainly learned. Years rolled by & here I was with my parents, in Trambakeshwar…able to pay our homage….. I could bring my parents to do Puja at the deity, inspite of the pressing crowd. Holding Maa on one hand & Baba by the other, supporting them & walking them slowly but surely towards our journey, I actually felt like Shravan Kumar, taking his parents to wherever they wanted to go (a very popular story from Ramayana days). Driving back to Mumbai had so many thoughts rushing in from the past. I felt peace & tranquil & content. I could fulfill one of my parent’s wish.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Me & my Parents...... Reunion !!!

The past one month has been very busy. My parents are here with me after so many years. Infact, this is the first time we are spending so much time together in more than 25 years…..sounds unreal na !!! But its true. How time flies….. snap of a finger & its gone…all of so many years. At times, I feel like travelling back…into the past…unfolding & opening up on what I’ve been silent for so many years. Guess, I will pen down a ‘down the memory lane’ on these bygone years in a separate column. Watch out for some real comedy of errors, melodrama, horror or har –har stories, struggle, et al. It’s going to be a real long story…so I’ll go year by year….. that itself is more than 25 episodes….Gawd!!! Guess it will be one episode a week. So bear with me pls!!!

Baba is 86 years now & Maa is almost 80. Our home, named ‘Ashroy’( meaning, a place for shelter), is at Kalyani, a remote town in West Bengal (about 76 kms on road from Kolkata). My elder sister (happily married with a college going son to manage) also stays in Kalyani about two kilometers away from my parents. Kalyani is a small industrial town in the dist of Nadia, West Bengal. The 1st CM of West Bengal, Mr Bidhan Chandra Roy, a great visionary, gave birth to the township of Kalyani, in Nadia & Salt Lake City, in Calcutta. He was a legendary physician, a distinguished Congress leader, an educationist and a philanthropist. He became the chief minister of West Bengal and transformed it from a problem state into a prosperous one. He was a leader whose advice Jawaharlal Nehru and Vallabhbhai Patel always relied upon. He focused on infrastructure at a time when very few people realized the importance of it. Unfortunately, his work then has not been managed well by the subsequent leaders, & the townships are losing their shine due to lack of proper maintenance. However, Kalyani still is a beautiful, quiet & green place.

A few months back, Maa went to the bathroom in the middle of the night to attend to nature’s call. She tripped & fell & suffered a bad blow on the left side of her head. Swelling & some internal bleeding led to almost a complete paralysis of her left side. She was bed ridden for more than two months, unable to even move. For someone who I can’t remember having been bed ridden ever, it was a torture. Doctors had almost given up, but I knew she would pull this off. I spoke to Guruji & his blessings were enough for me to believe so. I spent about a week with her & she showed remarkable improvement. She responded quite well to the physiotherapist & medicines. Today she walks on her own, does almost all that she has been doing over the years, by herself. She really has been my biggest strength over the years. Throughout my growing years & even now, she has always encouraged me to follow my heart…chase my dreams…..take risks in life. When I was a kid, she would sit with me after I came back from school, & tell me inspiring stories(all this, just to hold me from running out in the afternoon to play). I heard all about Ramayan, Mahabharat,Bhagwat Gita, Indian Independence from the British, Swami Vivekananda & so many more. She is extremely patient & always smiling. She's known to speak very less(everyone says so), but with me, I feel she enjoys speaking. I feel her silent support always. Incidentally, inspite of getting all the punishment from Baba, it was Maa, I was always scared of. I could never lie to her.

Baba is more agile than men half his age. He loves speaking. Give him an audience & he will take off. He can talk endlessly on almost any topic. In his salad days, he was very serious about everything…..always very disciplined & thorough in planning. In fact, more often than never, I would end up on the wrong side of his choices & he would get very upset. I still remember, he coming back after a hard day’s work, there would invariably be someone waiting for him to complain about me & my pranks. This would certainly get him angry & I would be at the receiving end of his ire. It was almost a daily affair..… someone complaining about me & I getting punished. Baba had a very short fuse. Baba is much mellowed down today. I guess, the lush green & cool breeze of Kalyani has had its effect. He still manages to ride a bicycle once in a while, in the lanes of Kalyani. He still finds the energy to do gardening. Sometimes he forgets that he needs to slow down & has to be actually told to do so. His enthusiasm is really awe inspiring. Today he spends a lot of his time with Ramkrishna Mission. He meditates a lot as well.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Hinduism - Communal or Secular ???

Today I ask a question that I am sure rakes up in the heart of every Hindu in India.

Do you consider that - Sanskrit is communal and Urdu is secular, Mandir is Communal and Masjid is Secular, Sadhu is Communal and Imam is secular, BJP is communal and Muslim league is Secular, Dr.Praveen Bhai Togadia is ANTI-NATIONAL and Bhukari is Secular, VandeMatharam is communal and Allah-O-Akbar is secular, Shriman is communal and Mian is secular, Hinduism is Communal and Islam is Secular, Hindutva is communal and Jihadism is secular, and at last, Bharat is communal and Italy is Secular?

When Christian and Muslim schools can teach Bible and Quran, Why Hindus cannot teach Gita or Ramayan ? Abdul Rehman Antuley was made a trustee of the famous Siddhi Vinayak Temple in Prabhadevi, Mumbai. Can ever a Hindu - say Mulayam Singh Yadav or Laloo Prasad Yadav- ever become a trustee of a Masjid or Madrasa? Dr. Praveen bhai Togadia has been arrested many times on flimsy grounds. Has the Shahi Imam of Jama Masjid, Delhi, Ahmed Bhukari been arrested For claiming to be an ISI agent and advocating partition of Bharat? When Haj pilgrims are given subsidy, why Hindu pilgrims to Amarnath, Sabarimalai & Kailash Mansarovar are taxed?
What happened in Jammu this year, over the land dispute for Amarnath Shrine Board would have made every true Indian hang his/her head in disgust & shame.
When will we wake up to our basic rights as a Hindu???

Our country has had a Muslim President, a Hindu Prime Minister and a Christian Defence Minister run the affairs of the nation with a unity of purpose.

Can this happen anywhere, except in a HINDU NATION - BHARATH?

Alphabetical Bengali !!!

A is for Awpheesh (as in Office). This is where the average Kolkakattan goes and spends a day hard at work. And if he works for the 'West Bengal Gawrment' he will arrive at 10, wipe his forehead till 11, have a tea break at 12, throw around a few files at 12.30, break for lunch at 1, smoke an unfiltered cigarette at 2, break for tea at 3, sleep sitting down at 4 and go home at 4:30. It's a hard life!
B is for Bhision. For some reason many Bengalis don't have good bhision. In fact in Kolkata most people are wearing spectacles all the time like IC, self, Bubai, Dibhai. Bhejeetable comes a close second to Bhision. Bhison is another word used to express extremes. E.g. Orre baba ki Bhison gorom, or ki Bhison thanda.
C is for Chappell. This used to be the Bengali word for the Devil, for the worst form of evil. In the night mothers put their kids to sleep saying, 'Na ghumaley Chappell team theke ber kore debe.' Now with IPL coming to Eden Gardens C is for 'Choppol diye maar', bhalo na khelley. Also in the league is ‘Chepe de’, Chomchom (a delicious sweet meat), Chembaar ( another word for country pistol…..something that always shoots at the wrong place!!)
D is for Debashish or any other name starting with Deb. By an ancient law every fourth Bengali Child has to be named Debashish. So you have a Debashish everywhere and trying to get creative they are also called Deb, Debu, Deba with variations like Debanik, Deboprotim, Debojyoti, etc. thrown in at times. There are also the female version as Debi, Debolina, Debaroti, Debanjona etc. D also denotes Darun, an expression for the finest findings, starting from lip smacking tasties to books, to music, to art….anything under the sun that is exceptional.
E is for Eeeeeeeesh. This is a very common Bengali exclamation made famous by Aishwarya Rai in the movie Devdas. It is estimated that on an average a Bengali, especially Bengali women, use eeesh 10,089 times every year. 'Ei Morechhey' or ‘Ei Sherechey’is a close second to Eeesh.
F is for Feeeeeeesh. These are creatures that swim in rivers and seas and are a favourite food of the Bengalis. Despite the fact that a fish market has such strong smells, with one sniff a Bengali knows if a fish is all right. If not he will say 'eeesh what feeesh is theesh!'
G is for Jongol.......hear a Bengali saying, eki re baba...eta toh Jongol.....Bagh eshe jabe.  also G is for Good name. Every Bengali boy will have a good name like Debashish or Deboprotim and a pet name like Motka, Bhombol, Thobla, Bumba, etc. While every Bengali girls will have pet names like Tia, Tuktuki, Mishti, Khuku, etc. G also reminds us of Gorom Cha, an all time fabharit, I mean favourite for all seasons. This is normally accompanied with moori- chanachoor or shingara, again an all seasons delight to the taste buds of Bengalis.
H is for Harmoniaam. This the Bengali equivalent of a rock guitar. Take four Bengalis and a Harmonium and you have the successors to The Bheatles!
I is for lleesh. This is a feeesh with 10,000 bones which would kill any ordinary person, but which the Bengalis eat with releeesh! Also the various variants of cooking this feeesh is just amaizing.
J is for Jhola. No self respecting Bengali is complete without his Jhola. It is a shapeless cloth bag where he keeps all his belongings and he fits an amazing number of things in. Even as you read this there are at least 2 million jholas bobbling around Kolkata- and they all look exactly the same! Note that 'Jhol' as in Maachher Jhol is a close second. Jhaantaa is another favourite with the average Bengali women, both for cleaning homes & cleaning up anything that is messy. ‘ Mar Jharoo mar Jharoo mere jhentiye bideye kor’, is a folklore with almost every Bengali household.
K is for Kee Kaando !. It used to be the favourite Bengali exclamation till eeesh took over because of Aishwarya Rai (now Kee Kando's agent is trying to hire Bipasha Basu). Another expression with a global usage amongst Bengalis is Ki Kemon dilam!!!.... the ego & the sentiments of the intellectual Bengali gets the best representations in this phrase.
L is for Lungi - the dress for all occasions. People in Kolkata manage to play football and cricket wearing it, not to mention the daily trip in the morning to the local bajaar. Now there is talk of a lungi expedition to Mt. Everest.
M is for Minibus, better known & pronounced as Minibaas. These are dangerous half buses whose antics would effortlessly frighten the living daylights out of all James Bond stuntmen as well as Formula 1 race car drivers. M is also for Maunkey Cap and Maaphlar!! They are every Bengali’s favourite head wear & head gear at the mere hint of winter or cold.
N is for Nangto. This is the Bengali word for Naked. It is the most interesting naked word in any language and is used with a lot of fervour!
O is for Oil. The Bengalis believe that a touch of mustard oil will cure anything from cold (oil in the nose), to earache (oil in the ear), to cough (oil on the throat) to piles (oil you know where!) Obbhyesh, as in habit is also another very popular word in the Bengali dictionary.
P is for Phootball. This is always a phavourite phassion of the Kolkattan. Every Bengali is born an expert in this game. The two biggest clubs there are Mohunbagan and East Bengal and when they play the city comes to a stop even today. On every occasion of a phootball match between these two giants, pheesh is sold at a premium, Chingri, as in prawns for Mohun Bagan fans and Elleesh, the one & only for the East Bengal fans.
Q is for Queen. This really has nothing to do with the Bengalis or Kolkata, but it's the only Q word I could think of at this moment. There's also Quilt but they never use them in Kolkata. Till not very long ago, Quinine was a household name as the all time cure for anyone having even a slight hint of temparachar, I mean temperature.
R is for Robi Thakur. Many many years ago Kabiguru Rabindranath Tagore ( SRK doesn't know how to address him properly)got the Nobel Prize. This has given the right to all Bengalis no matter where they are to frame their acceptance speeches as if they were directly related to the great poet and walk with their head held high. This is also closely associated with Robindro Shongeet, which every Bengali takes pride in. It is almost blasphemy not to know at least a dozen of Robindro Shongeet. You can hear high pitch practicing of Robindro Shongeet every early morning in the rural Bengal, even today. Note that 'Rawshogolla' comes a close second !
S is for Shourav. Now that they finally produced a genuine cricketer and a captain, Bengalis think that he should be allowed to play until he is 70 years old. Of course they will see to it that he stays in good form by doing a little bit of 'joggo' and 'maanot'. Shukto is another delicacy from the kitchens on Bengal, made out of most unimaginable mixture of herbs, shrubs, leaves & spices & mustard oil….the end result is of course one of mouth watering experience.
T is for Trams. Hundred years later there are still trams in Kolkata. Of course if you are in a hurry it's faster to walk. This heritage vehicle manages to be an integral part & parcel of Kolkata through all the urban changes. These moving structures manage to go off the tracks at almost every bends (especially in Central Kolkata), with effortless ease, leading to long traffic snarls, which is a sight by itself.
U is for Aambrela. When a Bengali baby is born he is handed one. The Jhola (mentioned above), more often than never has an aambrela, I mean umbrella tucked in amongst other important things.
V is for Bhaayolence. Bengalis are the most non-violent violent people around. When an accident happens they will fold up their sleeves, shout and scream and curse and abuse, "Chherey De Bolchhi" & keep inching backwards. The last time someone actually hit someone was in 1979.
W is for Water, pronounced normally as Oataar. For three months of the year the city is underwater and every year for the last 200 years the authorities are taken by surprise by this! U can actually see people sitting with fishing rods to make a prize catch of the very phavourit pheesh at College Square ( a very popular swimming pool in Central Kolkata)
X is for X'mas. It's very big in Kolkota, with Park Street fully lit up and all Bengalis agreeing that they must eat cake-pastry that day. The boisterous celebrations are more within the non Chistians.
Y is for Yesshtaarday. Which is always better than today for a Bengali (see R for Robi Thakur).
Z is for Jebra, Joo, Jipper and Jylophone .